“you sound a little addicted to his company sometimes”

That is what my friend from high school told me today. She’s been posting on live journal posts about her and her boy lately. So I’ve been keeping up and commenting and stuffs. Then she somehow switched the conversation to me and learning about my boy (She’s actually the first person to ask “who is ‘the boy ’?”) I guess I never explicitly stated anything on livejournal. The only people who really know anything about him have been told personally and I can count them on two hands.

My instinct tells me that the statement my friend made is very true. It is an addiction and I can never get enough of it. Kind of like anime, only worse cause there are more emotions involved. To put things into perspective, before he moved back to his hometown, we pretty much talked every night for 3-5 hours even through tests, exams and final projects. That’s…a lot of talking. The second thought is that the reason why I’m so addicted to his company is because he gives me lots of attention when we talk.

I’m not sure whether it’s supposed to be a bad thing or a good thing.

Addictions are usually not a good thing because too much of anything is not good for you. I understand that this obsession is not healthy for me. As a direct result, I go through lots of ups and downs emotionally with his absence/presence. I believe that those ups and downs indirectly put pressure on the boy to be around me (so it's not great for him either).

Even so, I feel much happier than I have ever been in my life. Over the past few months where we started talking pretty intensely, I think I’ve changed so much (for the better, of course). I have a long way to go, but my mindset is different than before.

I believe that this strong fascination with another person is one of the factors that drive a relationship (at least in the beginning), don’t you think? If you’re not interested in someone, then you would have no desire to talk to that person. Conversely, if you’re interested in someone, wouldn’t you want to know everything about that someone?

Final thought, I wonder why my friend actually said that statement. She's been staying over at her boy's place for the past few days. They seem to be spending a lot of time together. Doesn't she ever go through the same emotions? I just don't see how it's different except I whine and complain to everyone around me when I don't get to talk to the boy. I guess our circumstances are different and maybe that's the reason?

I guess my question is whether you think this “little addiction” is a good thing or not and whether it’s normal. I really don’t know what to think.

Hope you have a good evening