Hm. I suppose that things don’t change after all and I still cannot manage stress very well.

It was Thanksgiving /Mid-Autumn festival this weekend so I went home for a few days. My relatives went over to my parent’s house on Friday and it was nice (kind of) to see people. Luckily, the main focus was eating so I didn’t have to interact with too many of them. I think the highlight of the night was playing Text Twist on Yahoo games with my cousins. All four of us were crammed into this small room randomly yelling out words we saw. *laughs*

It’s so dumb how I lock myself up in my room and try to make myself feel better by doing things I like (watch tv and read manga) all while I worry about my upcoming tests and assignments. Worry and stress over something that hasn’t happened and hold myself back because of something that hasn’t happened yet.

I just have to try. I think I did a good first step in organizing my table/room. All I need is to start. Right now, I’m very ashamed of myself. I suppose that’s why I don’t want to talk to anyone.

It’s a battle that I’m all to familiar with and a battle that I’ve never won. I know a plan that can win the battle, but I’ve never been able to execute it correctly. But maybe, just maybe, this time will be different.

I feel stronger than before and I know that there are people who care and will support me if I ask.

As niisan might say, “JUST DO IT.”

For once, I think I will.